Funny:

*A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "so how do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil. "because i pissed in it's ear and it didnt move," answered the child. "you did what?!?!" asked the teacher. "i leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didnt move.

*A little girl asked her mother, "can i go outside and play with the boys?" her mother replied, "no you cant play with the boys, they're too rough." the little girl thought about it for a moment then said, "well, if i find a smooth one, can i play with him?"